Awake. Let's play 20 Questions. I'll ask, you answer. Or at the very least, I want you to THINK, really think and come up with HONEST answers. I once wrote, "we lie best when we lie to ourselves." Not sure if that was an original thought or if I heard it somewhere and forgot where … Continue reading 3:00 AM and I want to play 20 Questions.
Thoughts on my morning walk.
Anything learned can be un-learned or replaced. What do you gain or lose by changing the way you THINK about something? What does it hurt for you to stop seeing through hate, selfishness; the things your mother or father did or didn't do to you / for you / with you / because of you … Continue reading Thoughts on my morning walk.
Camp Journal, Day 13
Passed a milestone on the trail today. According to the sign post, I've just entered the halfway mark up the trail, give or take a step or two (word count 22,074). Slow and steady, it feels good to be making such progress. (stepping out of my pretend world for a minute, it has been "a … Continue reading Camp Journal, Day 13
Lessons Learned and Learning
There is no changing the other; no protection from its wrath should it decided to turn its sites on you. Instead, prepare for the outcomes as best you can. That is the only way. Whether it's personal / intentionally directed at you or not is irrelevant. Wondering why is a waste of energy best spent … Continue reading Lessons Learned and Learning
It’s Not Because I Don’t Care
Often I read someone's blog post and it gives me chills. I shiver at the memories their words evoke in me, I tremble slightly as the epic-ness of what they're going through rocks through me. I had one such blogger dude whose struggle with alcohol and depression was so eloquently, honestly, poetically expressed in his … Continue reading It’s Not Because I Don’t Care
Mother Truckin’ Sons of Biscuits!
Warning - may be unsuitable if you're highly empathetic, or already having a bad day. One of the rabbit holes turned out to have some poisonous mushrooms. What follows is me stumbling around in the dark, trying to clear the toxins from my system. Another 3 AM deal only this time, no easing back … Continue reading Mother Truckin’ Sons of Biscuits!
What if this is the fantasy…
and in my real life, I'm everything I want to be. Sort of turned my mind sideways on the drive in to work yesterday morning. The idea that all this hustle and what not to do more, get more, BE more, isn't reality. Instead, we're living the dream, it's our real lives that we're truly longing … Continue reading What if this is the fantasy…
Human BE-Ing
Human: noun = thing, object. Being: verb = doing something. We're three weeks into the "new year". The gyms are crowded, as are the many health food stores, the outer aisles at the grocery stores, and the "healthier" fast food places or restaurants. I imagine prescriptions for Chantix and it's cousins are up, as are … Continue reading Human BE-Ing
Monumental “Ah ha” Moment – I have found my “Gift”
Funny what pain does to me. I'm sure I've written it before, so forgive me if you've read this, but my headaches most often lead to inspiration. Not sure why but the pain takes me to a higher plane - I tend to have BIG FEELINGS when the headache fairy is trying her best to … Continue reading Monumental “Ah ha” Moment – I have found my “Gift”
Interlude.
Sigh. I saw this cartoon YEARS ago and it's stuck with me ever since. It sums up my thoughts on how most therapy should work. Well, maybe not exactly, but close enough. I mean, I spent time in therapy - I went in with two stipulations. Number one, no drugs. I was self-medicating enough as … Continue reading Interlude.